Golden Gate Bridge tamed by my fingers

http://90daysinsf.blogspot.com/

When small and Large change roles / Golden Gate Bridge tamed by my fingers

This journey is starting to feel increasingly real... I have just purchased my travel insurance.

So another beginning is just around the corner..
Soon I shall touch Golden Gate Bridge and cycle from Mission to Dolores Park for a morning Yoga Practice. (Oh how optimistic.. will I really do this in the foggy, chilly San Francisco, still sleepy pre-sunrise, mornings? - well.. Why not? But I may look out for some thermals to help the internal fires firing up on the way to the park. Curiously I can already picture the post practice juice in the nearby Cafe so much easier than the practice itself, now why would that be..??)

Then what about middles and endings? Well I will save this for another more reflective time. Until soon my new friends. Stay warm or cool depending on where you are.

when doing right is maybe equally wrong

Today I caught a thief in the street, who stole from my small struggling local grocery store.. While I held onto him and he returned his bounty I started to feel sad. Pathetic thin pretend-down jacket that he will likely hope will keep him warm this winter. A man in poverty and I caught him stealing. I don't feel good about myself at all. 

I cycled after him as soon as I could get away from the cheers of the shop worker, who called me superwoman and shouted "thief" and "shame" after the thief.. I tried to find him to give him £2. I think he could have used it even more than me. Being as short of money as I was in the last 5 months has really realigned my comprehension of 'not having'. 

Feel sad that I caught a thief and grabbed his jacket, so he couldn't escape a second time. 

:(

It doesn't matter how deep into a posture you go - 

what does matter is who you are when you get there. 

~Max Strom

one step closer to San Francisco today

At last I finally purchased my flight tickets! All was well until the moment I was prompted to select my return flight, the heart undertook a distinct thud landing. Heavy feelings predicting the way we both will feel as I step through security, leaving the other half behind in America while I board the plane to England. I just know how it will feel for sunny J. to sit on the public transport without me and I won't feel much happier flying in the wrong direction..

So it took me an infinitely long time to arrange my flights and select which felt like they might be good dates. Difficult. And right at the end United Airlines didn't accept Paypal after all. I did all this research and found their page where they are so proud of offering paypal payment options. Nonsense. It was nowhere to be found when I looked for it. So my poor squealing credit card had to stand in once more.

Now I have my ticket. Finally there is a clear schedule! I will relax as soon as I have booked my travel insurance. The silliest things have the power to stop one from flying. So I would like to be prepared just in case. And taking a trip to America without travel insurance would be pure madness anyway.

the winds are changing / change of direction

And today I stood up for myself. In a way that I had not dared to in 4 years. It is a little too early to report the details but I have a feeling that maybe now I can get my voice back. I have never before felt as voiceless as I did in the past 4 years. When I began a particular journey I began it with a strong voice, I was shaken from another life event, but I felt that I had a confident voice that was worth hearing.

I emerged from the journey that I had embarked upon muted, whimpering, voiceless. And it has been a mystery to me where my voice went, why I couldn't retrieve it, why I lost the strong path I had chosen for myself. With my voice I lost vision, too. Perhaps there are some among you who are familiar with the curious phenomenon of when you can not find your glasses and try to have a conversation while your eyes just can not really focus.. And for inexplicable reasons, it should be the opposite, but you just can not hear properly, you can't concentrate on the sounds and you can't focus your mind. All because of the absence of your spectacles that have helped you find the vision in your life.. It is always a huge relief when I relocate these absentee glasses..

Why it might be that I lost my vision as well as my voice? I am not sure exactly, I have theories, but I will leave these to mature a while and write more in another post. Have you ever lost your voice or vision? I would love to hear a little about your feelings and musings. Please be welcomed to post in the comments section.

new project ...

30 days and my new project will go live:
For more information: please check the page link above '90 days in San Francisco'

gathering the means to make a journey

I would like to introduce you to my other Blog Surplus Possessions Sale. At the moment I have listed for sale: Yoga mats, Yoga mat bags & Handmade Indian Notebooks..
You can buy everything you see, and if it is not linked to an online shop then just ask and I can either send you a paypal invoice or create a custom listing for you. 

*dvds (yes this is where the actual surplus comes in)
*books
*clothing and shoes and
*odds and ends

Making space.. & Making a journey possible..
Read the post: Yoga Mat Bags & story posted on september 8th.

http://surpluspossessionssale.blogspot.co.uk/

yogi

and this is somebody who teaches me a lot...

Cambodia last year flooding, this year drought - 2012

Last year the flooding destroyed many crops of rice across Cambodia, causing hardship across the country. This year drought is threatening the harvest. The rainy season should have started in May but until now there is hardly any rain, 11 provinces are affected. My friend Nakry and his family rely on their crop. They have not got enough income to eat well without it. Another failed crop will cause a lot of hardship and malnourishment. I am including a link to a Food Security website with more detailed information about the situation in Cambodia right now. If anything reports like these underplay the seriousness. They are intended to provide factual information, I am concerned for my friends's wellbeing.
http://foodsecuritylink.net/cambodia/index.php?option=com_k2&view=itemlist&layout=category&task=category&id=1&Itemid=40

In september I will spend some time to try and collect a few modest donations once more. But this year I would like to help Nakry with the fees for a certified french language course. He can't afford it himself, but certificates of his french ability will help him secure better income and greater job security over time. This is something he lacks and wishes for. He hasn't asked me for it but I would like to offer.

If possible I would like to extend this to his 17 year old cousin who being a girl left school when money was tight in the family to work as day labourer on other people's fields. Through Nakry's position as a guide at the Silk Farm outside Siem Reap she might well be able to also get employed there if she can learn english and a second language.

I would like to extend these possibilities to as many of his family members as possible.

--
the drought is also leaving 4.3 million people short of drinking water.

a deadline is approaching

I am looking for words to write this dissertation that I need to finish by
August the 28th. I'm writing about drawing, about the body and movement..
I will let you know if and when I really get a grasp on what I am trying to say.
In the meantime this is what it feels like to concentrate, access my mind and focus:

Time to Find Out- Chris and Thomas

A beautiful reminder that life is for now.

this could be an entry from my diary

of course this wonderful teacher is a lot more senior to me, but what he says is so central to which way I am thinking about Yoga. And I've recently started to feel quite estranged from what seems to be going on with Yoga classes. 'when you are training for a marathon it doesn't matter what you feel... in the yoga practice there is no race...'.

what I am watching for inspiration today

Yvonne Pouget: "Lu Labbru" from Gianni Lamagna

announcement Artist vs Holistic Professional

Dear friends: just in case you are a little confused if you know me only as a full time artists. I've decided that for better balance in life I would like to contribute more to my own as well as other's wellbeing and sense of balance. I remain adamant to exhibit in Venice at the most glorious Art Biennale there is, rather sooner than later, I continue to make art and take it professionally serious

. But Health is a gift that I would like to remind everyone to value. And I would like to support friends and strangers as they become my students and clients in finding their best balance.

I choose to earn my living not with bar/cafe work or selling items that clutter our beautiful and fragile planet but instead with something that I see as a gift to our health. A gift that leaves no trace other than a sense of wellbeing, improved immune system, greater flexibility, better focus of mind, better sleep.... (endless benefits).. I wonder if you understand this. I would like to invite you to book a treatment with me before the end of august as I have some plans that may take me out of Liverpool (art plans). In january I might teach in Cambodia, which would mean that I will continue bodywork training in Thailand straight after. Which would in turn mean that your next chance of a treatment will be around february/march, at potentially increased cost unless you are an existing client... Don't leave your body hanging, take the opportunity now. Looking forward to seeing you for Massage or Yoga. (if you really want to you can also massage your brain: I still teach German language)

A brief notice

A brief note: I will NOT be offering Fabio style Yoga Classes any time soon, unless money gets even tighter.. I give it about one more week...

This is my good friend Nakry

This is my friend whom I wish I could look out for more. I realize I am not even great in looking out for myself. But all the same: All donations that I can raise go towards his families basic support and beyond that: they have dreams of education ! Like school! Or a year long apprenticeship to become an electrician (Nakry's brother would like of this) Can we make it possible? Do you want to help out?

my paypal account is linked to my e-mail address: birgitdeubner(AT) gmx(dot)net

I forward increments of $100+ via Wstern Union to him and his family. You can read more in earlier posts on this blog. You can follow this link: overthesevenseas.blogspot.co.uk/ most posts are made in 2011, and some before actually. I haven't posted anything new, as there is not much new to say: the need is great. Small help, helps hugely.

I hope to see my friend again in 2013 when I might be going to Cambodia to teach.

*** update: a key post to read about the struggles of many Cambodian families, due to last year's flooding, may be this: overthesevenseas.blogspot.co.uk/2011/11/cambodia-5.html

I am so many things:

"Physical Theatre training (basic - maybe intermediate) Professional Artist (accomplished) Yoga Teacher (qualified) Thai Massage Practitioner (qualified) vegetarian/vegan cook (applauded)"


and that's not all: "German teacher (experienced), photographer (experienced), workshop leader & assistant (experienced), Art teacher (very experienced), Art Handling Technician, bookshop employee, Art invigilator, Theatre Lighting Technician, Theatre front of House staff, Volunteer Coordinator, Drama Workshop leader (experienced in them all - except the lighting is so long ago I wouldn't like to call myself proficient now),  dog sitter (yes, I've done that, too), snail hunting (yes)"

Message from the universe,

 via Birgit: A special gift this week for You or your friend


If you come to my house and bring just £20,  90 minutes and your lovely self, THEN I would like to invite you for a footmassage (+ lower leg) this week that will make you feel like you are floating. I will use oils mixed with cream, you will sit back in silence, enjoying the green trees outside of my window and sips of endless herbal tea. 
You would not have a big meal before, but rather eat a little than come hungry. You would have washed your feet that day (small dust and a day's-use-traces no problem at all, that's what they are there for) 
You would smile, cry, breathe, mostly breathe and enjoy your treat. 
Which day is suitable for you?  
Your friend the universe via Birgit. xxx
location: Liverpool UK

+44 (0)7415 188 944

(Normal price for this massage £45-£50, normal low income concession limited to 2 clients per week (on application): £25)

new items in my etsy shop

and it's the project:

'A wild sheep chase' 

the photo isn't listed, but the drawing is.

CLICK on the sheep to be taken to my shop

to see more drawings. 

my birthday is sneaking upon me

I know I'm not meant to ask, but it would make me extra happy..: 
It's my Birthday on Monday the 23rd.. If you send messages via letter pigeon..

interview with Richard Freeman

I wish I could embed the whole video, here is a link to it,
https://projectrestoration.com/richardfreeman
below is a snack sized section of the 20 minute interview
(for full interview follow the link above).


I seem to have taken a very long time to find my way to Richard Freeman, from
what I have seen of his talks and practice demonstrations he resonates with me
so much. I am for the first time in years considering to spend real money on a yoga
publication. Perhaps his dvd, perhaps the cd of chants.. Both expensive for me at
the moment, but I think the sooner the better...

I found Sounds True in America (through which Richard Freeman runs an interactive
pranayama talks series) - they have a special offer on his cds and dvds at the moment -
in case the hyperlink doesn't work use the next link and navigate the site:
http://www.soundstrue.com/

making truffles

celebrating feeling better

with homemade: organic cocoa, date and nut truffles. no sugar, no butter, no eggs, no dairy, no flour.. delicious !

daily miracles we forget to notice

People usually consider walking on water or in thin air a miracle. But I think the real miracle is not to walk either on water or in thin air, but to walk on earth. Every day we are engaged in a miracle which we don’t even recognize: a blue sky, white clouds, green leaves, the black, curious eyes of a child — our own two eyes. All is a miracle.

 ~ Thich Nhat Hanh ~

(I found this quote on www.sheof108names.wordpress.com)

BKS Iyengar / The Wealth of Health versus Appearances

There is something so awe inspiring about watching this 45 year old film footage of BKS Iyengar demonstrating asana. Who was the audience? Did they have any understanding or was this a form of outlandish gymnastics to them? After all these years of practicing yoga even I still find it strange to watch a yoga asana practice. It definitely is an experience to be had within, rather than observed externally.

In my parallel life I am a professional Artist, from this perspective I really should promote my work, chase the career, socialize strategically.. The more I practice Yoga Asana, the more my life changes, and it becomes increasingly impossible to abuse my body with 16 hour work days for the sake of appearing ‘successful’. In reality my name gains credential, it does indeed, and at the same time my body gains internal wounds from exhaustion, from one too many times rushed to meet a deadline..

In the past year I have spent significantly more time thinking about the Wealth of Health than about which gallery to attempt to impress into exhibiting and selling my work. I am still finding my way, but while it scares me I also feel that it was the only sensible decision to take a full 18 months out from even considering to make any Art work or engage in the Art crowd. My feet feel like they landed on the ground a little. My health is improving, and still I am fragile. The healthiest years in my life were those when I practiced yoga 3-4 times a week without fail. 6 days a week seems to deplete me.

I believe it is possible that this has to do with my approach to the practice and my approach to the days following. I strongly believe that Ashtanga practice can be restorative, in my experience it was depleting, but I have a feeling that was my way of practicing and living that could have been responsible.

What do you think?

life essentials; in the words of a friend of mine

"Passionate about healthy conscious living in the full spectrum of life: work, relationships and the rest." Julian Giacomelli chief at: http://www.crudessence.com